As I write this, I am listening to a song from Evita. It’s the one where she meets Peron and seduces him. At first I thought of going to the next song then realized it’s what I am spending much of my time doing these days, seducing the men around me. So now I am playing the song over and over and listening to the flavor- like moving chocolate around my mouth, tasting every nuance and mood.
Tonight I added some body movements to my role. I need to continue to work on confidence while doing them, truly becoming the high class whore I want to portray. I wish I could just take away every inhibition I have and “chair dance the shit out of that role”. That is the point I am hoping to get to. Every rehearsal gets better. As I sat with beer in hand talking to two of my fellow cast members at a bar after rehearsal tonight, I wondered how far our director will let me take it. I have a feeling, it’s pretty damn far. Much farther than I am going now. It is like putting on my makeup for the show. My place at the long dressing table is between the actors playing Linda and Bernard. Bernard has a minor in stage makeup so he has been teaching me about color and application. I was working on applying blush and makeup to my eyes and he told me to keep putting it on. It feels good to finally have a reason to go all out and to really layer it on. Stage makeup I am discovering, is really fun. I think the sexuality in this role is a lot like that. I really need to put myself all out there and to deeply revel in it and enjoy it. I am excited to get there. You can bet I’ll be working on this tomorrow.
365-09 #19
You talkin lap dance or chair dance? It is great to see you starting to believe what others have told you for some time. You can strut your stuff for me anytime, lady.