It has now become a running joke amongst my small group in Portland. We meet once a month to talk together about spiritual and emotional growth and for the past several months we have been focusing on the enneagram which we have loved looking at together. For those who know the enneagram, I am a four – the individualistic artist. Makes sense doesn’t it? If you don’t know the enneagram, I know how you feel. I went through many of my years at seminary hearing my friends bat their numbers around like they were doing religious algebra. “Well, I’m a seven with an eight wing moving on to the five.” Hello? What is that supposed to mean? So I took a class on the subject from Katie Skurja. I would recommend her workshops to anyone by the way. Her material was one paradigm shift after another for me. Still is, actually…
Our homework has been to work on something characteristic of our number. I admit, I sort of fell into doing it without really meaning to follow through on the assignment. Oops. As you know if you’ve read my previous posts, I’ve been doing a lot of inner work with my body, even getting massages. (Another good recommendation for anyone in the Salem area.) Then one month, I show up with short, spiked hair. I had had worn my hair in a style I call “a bob with a twist” since I was in my early twenties so this was actually quite a big change and LOOOONNNGGG overdue. I loved it!
The next month, we’re sitting out in the backyard and I turn my face to show them my nose piercing. It was something I had thought about doing for years but never had the courage to do it. But, God has a great sense of humor and he placed me in a job where I talked with a body piercer and asked her all my questions. She is one of those people who you immediately feel deeply at ease with and very safe as if you could tell her anything. A priecious find. So to her I went and she was great. She actually made sticking a needle through my nose a fun experience! I can see why she calls her shop Addictions. (Recomendation #3). Showing my small group my piercing was particularly fun as one of the members has been a mentor and friend to me since my early twenties, someone who has seen my journey first-hand.
The women started teasing me at that point what I was going to come with next month. So here is the answer – red hair. And spikier too! I think I may have to get a tattoo or my eyebrow pierced for month number four…
So I’ve been thinking about this and as a good poet, have come up with a good metaphor. Snake skin. As I’ve been growing and learning these last few years, like a snake, I outgrew my skin. Who I was inside didn’t match who I looked like on the outside. It feels so freeing to finally have all parts of me congruent with integrity. It’s one of the things fours tend to do. They have a whole world inside them and though that is still true, I am much more open to sharing it and sharing who I am by how I look. Also, something fours tend to do. It’s important to be comfortable in your own skin and I admit, I enjoy breaking the boxes people tend to put me in. I imagine God likes doing that too. One of the best parts is, I don’t think I’ve been carded for a drink since I cut my hair. I know I will enjoy being carded one day, but I have tended to look far younger than I am so I see this as a great accomplishment. Cheers!