Today we’re going to start with dessert. Namely, peanut m&ms. Amazingly enough, they will explain why I believe everyone, no matter what their beliefs, has God’s presence within them. (Let’s pause here as I thank God for letting me live in a time when I would not be burned at the stake for saying this, though Deanna says I would be persecuted no matter when I lived for one reason or another because I “keep running my mouth”.)
For those who don’t know what peanut m&ms are, picture a peanut covered in chocolate with a hard candy colored shell.
The peanut inside the m&m is the unique image of God we have inside each of us, the reflection of him, his spirit inside us. He made us each in his image and no matter who we are, we all have that core of divinity, of eternity, glowing inside us. It is a light of priceless worth. It is who we truly are.
The chocolate covering the peanut is all the crap and shame in our lives, it’s those nasty places we don’t like showing to others, the hard things to admit, to talk about, to be open with. It’s the things about us and about our past we are ashamed of and want to hide away. It’s the sludge we swim in, our unhealthy places full of the things we haven’t worked through.
The hard candy shell is the mask we put over ourselves to hide our shame. It’s the smile that doesn’t light up or eyes, the scowl, the anger, the pretend face. It’s who we present to the world so they don’t know what is going on under the surface. Different people choose different masks, different shells, even religiosity can be a shell.
Everyone has all three things in our lives: the peanut, the chocolate, and the shell. We are each a peanut m&m.
So why is this important? Picture someone with a hard candy shell, someone you know who has such a thick exterior, it’s hard to get to know them. Or picture someone you know who has a reaction to something disproportional to the question or issue brought up. Perhaps it’s a topic they get particularly angry about, or you ask a simple question and they get really mad or go hide away. Now picture someone who you can clearly see God’s image in. The first person, the one with the thick exterior is hard to get to know, hard to really talk to. The one with the disproportional response is also hard to be in relationship with as you never know what will set them off. The third though, the one in whom you can see God’s image, is someone you can trust, someone who brings delight to life.
Here are illustrations for each person on how their peanut m&m might look.
Hard to get to know:
Disproportional reactions:
In this case, you touch a crack in their shell and get their “chocolate”.
In this one, the person is all nerves, they don’t have much protective shell at all and are thus, very sensitive.
Easy to see God within them:
In my own life, my candy hard shell was my silence. As the shame and crap in my life grew, I became quiet and retreated. I stopped putting myself out there and taking risks. As I’ve worked through my chocolate and shell, my voice got louder, stronger, and I accepted the power I have inherent within me. I learned and am definitely still learning to live out of my peanut. One of my chocolate pieces, a reaction I did not expect to be as angry as it was, was when this issue of submission came up. Knowing how powerful working through some of my other chocolate has been, I want to face this dark matter and find the peanut, the image of God underneath.
This is the challenge for each of us: to work through our shell and chocolate so we can live out of our peanuts. Be patient with yourself and others as they do this. Everyone has their own pace, everyone has their own path they must take. For example, the shell should be dismantled piece by piece, it has been a protection up to this point. If too much comes off at once, it leaves raw nerves and exposed vulnerability way too soon before the person can handle working through their shame. The chocolate needs gentle yet firm hands to help sort through things with the acknowledgement that none of the chocolate is God’s truth. However, God takes the chocolate and makes it into something beautiful and pure but we have to turn over the chocolate into his loving hands first. We have to be willing to face it head on, to take a steady look, acknowledge our chocolate before we can work through it. You have to let the chocolate go. The chocolate is not your Imago Dei (Latin for Image of God). The shell and chocolate is not who you are. Your peanut is who you are. Your peanut is the person God made you to be. Live out of your peanut. After all, God loves nuts.
This is a song I love that speaks to so many of these truths:
(Thanks to Deanna who sacrificed several of her peanut m&ms to be pictured for this post.)
In this one, the person is all nerves, they don’t have much protective shell at all and are thus, very sensitive.
Hey, Sarah–
Great post. I love the concept of "living out of your peanut."
I admit, I've been pulled away from reading Quaker blogs and following QuakerQuaker, but the upcoming QUIP conference and bloggers' panel prompted me to look you up here.
Blessings,
Liz Opp, The Good Raised Up